6 Things Not To Say To A Parent Of A Newly Diagnosed Autistic Child

When a mom is told that her child is autistic, it brings up many feelings. Most of them are “negative.” They are feelings of sadness, anger, depression, denial, shame, grief and the list can go on.

And honestly, these feelings do not go away overnight.

When you first hear the news, most time it takes you’re a while to process the information. While processing the information, you have to begin the process of providing your child with the best care and services he/she needs to set him/her up for success.

When you tell someone in your immediate circle about this diagnosis, they may say things that you may or may not agree with and most it if can seem offensive.

  1. Is your child an artist or musician or can count cards like Rain Man?

 Every child has special abilities and talents. It’s just a matter of how the parents are involved and provide the tools to help him/her succeed.

2. You’d never know that he or she is autistic she or he looks completely normal.

Autism is the invisible disability. There is no look.

3. God doesn’t give you more than you can bear. Everything happens for a reason.

Things happen. Having an autistic child is not a punishment. It’s not a burden. Stop making moms that have children with autism feel like we have special force or power.  We are just being parents to our children.  

4. Girl I know exactly what you’re going through.

Just because you know someone that has an autistic child does that mean that you totally understand the  struggle. We take care of our autistic children 24/7

5. You have other children. Are they autistic too?

Just because you have one autistic child doesn’t mean that they’re all autistic.

6. Have you tried  Try CBD oil,  Or the new medicine  on TV,  Or don’t give your child injections or don’t or take  them to therapy, ect.

There is no cure for autism. Yes, there are treatments that will help your child function better, however it will never go away.

 Be mindful of what you tell or ask a mom of a newly diagnosed autistic child. They are still struggling with their feelings of receiving this unexpected news.

From Suspecting to Accepting: How to cope with the full spectrum of emotions

They recommended early intervention at the age of 2.

By the time my son was three years old I realized something was different about him.

The school called me in for a meeting because of these new behaviors.

But they couldn’t give me any answers.

I went to a specialist and I finally discovered what it was.

They mentioned something about a spectrum.

I had to look it up to figure out what it meant.

Long story short, I went through several stages of emotions as I began to accept the news.

I needed a support group, but I didn’t have one.

I was a single mom just trying to give my son the support he needed.

I didn’t know what to do.

The school was no help but once again I was determined to give my son the support he needed.

I was able to connect with a few friends who work in the field and they were able to give me the support I needed so I could be there for my son.

Through this process, I learned how to accept the circumstances, but I realize that everyone doesn’t have what I had.

That’s why I’ve created a support program for moms who where I was.

It’s called From Suspecting to Accepting: How to cope with the full spectrum of emotions

In this program you’ll eliminate…

D.E.N.I.A.L. The emotion preventing acceptance of the diagnosis

A.N.G.E.R. The emotion stopping you from taking control of the situation

G.U.I.L.T. The emotion that places blame (that you don’t need or deserve)

G.R.I.E.F. The emotion preventing you from focusing on what could be

I believe you can support your child through this process, but only when you learn to support yourself first.

To join me just click join my upcoming webinar :

Thank you so much for reading.

Feel free to share.

Bernadette Henry

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